How to tell if a girl is NOT interested in you

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This is not a very tough question. It can be a tough question too, depending on the girl. Everyone has a different character, thus it’s impossible to know if the girl is interested in you by just following the points below.

If she’s not interested in you…

  • She NEVER initiates contact with you, be it on MSN or sms.
  • She is uncomfortable with light touching for eg. playful punching or nudging.
  • She cancels dates with you without proposing a make-up date.
  • She does not even agree to go out with you and does not suggest alternative timings.
  • She pours out all her emotional baggage to you. (When not together yet.)
  • She takes a long time to reply your sms or may not even reply.
  • She playfully call you her brother.
  • She talks about other guys to you.
  • She is indifferent towards you.
  • No matter how hard u try to impress her, she just ignore u.
  • She never want to look at your eyes, or stay any minute with u and would find uncomfortable with u around.
  • She will not engage in open communication with you
  • She makes up stories for not wanting to meet you
  • She keeps things about herself from you.
  • She is self absorbed and preoccupied with her own life which does not include you.
  • She rarely initiates a call or sms to you.
  • When you ask her out for a date, she’ll ask, “who’s going?”
  • You buy expensive gifts for the girl, she thanks you very politely and tells you not to spend so much money on her or that there is no need to even buy her a birthday gift.
  • If you invite her to concert or expensive dinners, she tells you that she is not free almost immediately.

That’s almost all, but this doesn’t apply to all girls. You must know that some girls are generally too shy to express their love for you.

Guys, although it’s the 21st century, I feel it’s only right for the guy to take initiative.

Whats your opinion?

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  • Shelley

    I was having a boyfriend. We were known for long time and we promised we will be together for ever. Both of us are married and not satisfied with the present spouse. But because of some misunderstanding I quarrelled with him and humiliated him in front of his friends. After that I realized my mistake and apologized with him. He told me he will try to forget everything. After that we met again he promised me everything happened because of misunderstanding and now we will be together for ever.But after some while, we never met each other. no proper communication from him for 1 month. But for me he is my everything. He is the only one who gave such a good satisfaction in my life. I wanted him. I wanted us to meet, to have sex, to love each other again. He is very good.and l know He was made for me. But some hindrance keep keeping us apart. i tried to get close to him but nothing was working out until one day i heard about a spell caster called [email protected], i decide to try his love spell and definitely it worked out perfectly for me, it never took time for the spell to start working, after some few days my lover came to me and wanted us to start our relationship again, our lover is so tight now that nothing can brings us apart, this love spell is wonderful


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  • jack

    If a girl talks to you about how hot some male celebrities are is that the same as talking to you how hot other guys at college are?
    p.s we both go the same college

  • christian louboutin pointed toe

    Heya i am for the first time here. I found this board and I find It really useful & it
    helped me out a lot. I hope to give something back and help others like
    you helped me.

  • ChandyGarcia

    funny to know that all of us here having problems about a girl we love.
    well I have a problem too.

    well I’ve just read these words from google too. and it helps me somehow. here it is:

    “you just have to lay back and accept the fact that you can’t get what you want all the time.

    …and it makes life beautiful”.

    its so hard to accept the fact that you can’t get what you want all the time but its all there is sometimes it is easier to accept the truth.

    • Munterboy

      Its kinda hard to accept the fact “that you cant get what you want all the time” when you cant get what you want ever! and your life is shit and you know your going no where and you are going to end up alone.

  • argh ami

    Problem : Well..I am in love with this gal from my medical school..She actually had a couple of failed relationship before but single at the very moment..We are god friends and even did our evening classes together which i arranged and she approached me to do it..well we had a pact to inform each other every thing that will be declared regarding college classes..and both of us actually follow it..initially she was just a friend,but now i started to like her..its being 2 years now and i could not say that to her,partly because i am too shy,secondly because her mom is a friend of my mom and lastly i fear if she refuse the friendship will end..Well,i have never been too vocal and friendly with gals throughout my life and has been a complete i cannot even decipher if she likes me or not and wanna me to take her out on some date..she smiles at my jokes and when i compliment her,she laughs and also tells me am a good man..and even goes overboard revealing that she is into alcohol(she tells me that her mom dont know about it) and when her grand ma had a surgery she herself told me how she felt bad and how close she was to her grandma..but most of the time the chatting is over facebook and sms…because rarely we do get time in college to really sit together,but one or two ocassions we did we chatted for hours..but these may be common among friends too and since i had never ever had a girlfriend before i really feel at sea whther its just friendly or she likes me..her mom is afriend of my mom too and that what makes me even more jittery to ask her out..many a times she is the one to start the chat in facebook and delve away from study gossips to other things..She takes my compliments and well laughs a lot at my compliments and even sends me compliments like nice man and good man and i respect your determination etc and suggest me this and that brand of liquoir and when quizzed tells me she has no bf.She once told me she had a crush on a certain senior but when i replied that senior was married(obviously i was jealous) she told me marriage cant be naice and i replied in affirmative..She praised me when i baked cakes and that was the last time she ever talked about a guy she likes to me..She has a couple of good female friends and a couple of male friends all of whom are engaged..she texts me now and then about classes on her own but when probed further just reminds me of the pact we actually had.She evn tells me her career goals..but as i said before i am still sceptical to take the plunge because i dont wanna end this friendship and also riun our mom’s friendship too..but this is probably the last year we have in graduation in college and next we will move into different Post grad courses and we wont ever be so close i really want an honest opinion what to do…because am all but exhausted pondering the right path..Thanks in advance:)

    • patrick medley

      I’m only a freshman in highschool. I met this girl in 8th grade, I’ve liked her ever since the beginning of the year, we now go to different highschools, so the only communication I have with her is facebook, there are a few things that bug me about that, 1. She can easily find a boyfriend before I see her again
      2. Some of those reasons listed above are true, I believe its the sms one, although she did tell me she is shy.
      3. I don’t even know if she likes me back, I wonder how to figure it out since I can only chat with her online :( moving on is not an option, especially at the school I go to :/

    • Ayush Garg

      tel her man!!

  • Denis

    i met a girl at one of my mates parties. i was being the alpha male of the party be far. Some of my friends were being mean to her but so was i but in a funny way. all at once she yells out that she hates my mate and likes me. As the night is going we talk and shes always around me, all my buddies are saying fuck her man shes in to you but im not that kind of guy. I like the game but im a relationship type of guy so i just left it to talking.

    Then the unexpected happened she gives me her phone and asks me for my number. i give it (i think a little to easy), she texts me 2min later. your the biggest guy here. I replied can you handle it. she says “yes!!!!”.

    As that was going on my mate was being a dick to her and she wanted to leave to some TED guys party. she left 5mins after( asked me twice to go with her) but im not giving up me mates.

    4 days go buy i texted her and we chatted all day, asked her out for a casual drink but she had practice till 11pm witch i know she was not lieing becasue my female friend did the same sport the year before, she tells me to text her tomorrow.

    tomorrow– i wait till 4pm start texting her for about two hours then i ask how about that drink? she said she cant becasue her room mate was in a bad mood she had to hang out with her. i text her – well now im just mr.bad timing eh ahahha, give me a text on the weekend and ill see if i can fit you in.

    do you think i have any chance or is shes saying fuck off in a nice way.

    • Dee

      Meh, this is just my opinion but, who knows everyone is different. But if my roommate was in a bad mood, and someone I really liked wanted me to hang out, I’d still be with my roommate, but probably not for the whole time. And usually as well if someone really likes you but cannot make it that day, usually I’d think they’d come back and say well I should be free at such and such a time. That’s how it has usually worked with me. But there is like you said bad timing. The first incident I know you can write off. It was no excuse what so ever, so if she does it again a third or fourth time without trying to make it up, then I doubt she is really into you, probably just a casual acquaintance or good friend, or may be she’s scared as well about leading you on? There could be a lot of things, next time ask her if she is free anytime during the week, and if still comes up with something then I am pretty sure she doesn’t think anything more than friends. If you really want to be near someone you like, u wil find time to fit them in, even if its only for 5 minutes of their company.

  • tom

    i liked a girl in my colg, i was a sophomore and she ws a her freshers party i gave a rose, she dint knew it was commin…okay after then i passed out i dint even speak to that girl for like 3 yrs…
    now, after passing out from my colg., i send her a text tellin her that that rose thing was not meant in a disrespectful way, from dat day its been 7 months v are chattin only chattin.
    she said she had a very bad relationship and cant b in one right nw, she only text she calls me but tells me over text that she couldnt speak to me, or meet me in personal bcoz she says shes afraid..
    i keep reminding her from time to time that i lyk her n ol…i dont knw what she thinks of me, i really like this girl, but what can i do, if she doesnt want me to call her, or meet her…i’m startin to hate her for these kind of things.

    • dj

      She’s using you dude,.. Be careful and don’t put your hopes up for her,..

  • Vikas

    I like a girl in my school. She smile twards me and i also.its in only three days,i wants to purpose him but i fear that if she reject me then whats about my emotions. Pls tell me what i will say to him. 9982146525 .

  • Andrew

    I met this girl about 2 months ago and I was pretty sure she liked me. She went on a 2 dates with me and we seemed to have a good time. After the second date I feel as though I messed things up and this is how… I haven’t kissed her yet and had I some opportunities, but failed to do so. Yes, I know… I’m a pussy for not kissing her yet. I just get really intimidated in the moment and wimp out. I want to kiss her really bad too. So I tried setting up another date and I told myself I was going to kiss her on the 3rd one. She said she might be able to hangout this weekend but didn’t know yet, because of softball. I texted her again and had a great conversation and she said she would text me back the next day and hasn’t the past 2 days. Should I text her? Do you think its over and should just give up?

    • meee

      Ugh this is what is wrong with you please talk to her…. As me being a girl most of the time we ARE afraid to talk to you. Just talk to her.. she could be busy.. Don’t give up if she hasn’t aid anything. But don’t be so annoying… don’t text her every second if she doesn’t respond she is either busy or ignoring you. Talk to her like you would a friend. And just because you didn’t kiss her doesn’t mean she doesn;t like you. Sometimes we don’t want to be kissed right away.. We want that perfect first kiss with the boy she likes.

      • Vikas

        I like a girl in my school. She smile twards me and i also.its in only three days,i wants to purpose him but i fear that if she reject me then whats about my emotions. Pls tell me what i will say to him. 9982146525

    • Ghost girl

      Little advice most girls are like you with the kiss we’ll wimp out I guess you could say because we don’t want to be the one to screw up but don’t ask why she hasn’t called

  • Mendes

    I like this girl. she’s different. we have too much in common, we laugh , have eye contact a LOT, we think in the same way about a lot of things, i like being around her, she touches me a lot when we’re walking. the thing is, when we are not together shes diferent, she talks too little over the phone or facebook, but i think she does that to every person. i should mention i got out of a 2 yr long relationship 2 months ago, and she almost the same . sometimes i think she’s into me sometimes i dont, i mean when you are into someone you like to talk over the phone, you try to have lots of contact. well she doesnt and i dont contact her because i dont wanna seem too needy wich i am not, i just wanted to get some more attention from her. help

    • aKaHandsomeDevil

      Look, bro. I have the same problem as you. So i would recommend you, text her once in 3 to 4 days, the same with calling. Yeah, you will need for her to invest in you, not the opposite way around.
      How do you make her invest on you, make her scratch your back, give you a massage, cook for you or cook together. Get physical with her. Play some sports with her, but be the same team. This kind of girl is rare and special, she rare to lie to you. She is the kind of girl that is only for one man, so she also afraid to give herself to you. So that way, she is attract to you when you are around, but when you not she acts very uninterested towards you. She usually falls in love with guy who is dominant, spontaneous, passionate man, who has his life handle.

  • senbonzakura

    hey guys, i really need your help for this. i met this girl around 3 weeks prior to this comment, a friend of mine introduced us at this party event in uni (the reason was because we do the same course together). anyways, the thing is i never really thought about it until after i’ve talked to her over facebook, and she seems like an awesome person. we’ve only been communicating over facebook (with the exception that i saw her on the bus and we talked all the way to our lecture). the thing is she shows all the “signs” that say that a girl likes you (i.e. replies are in reasonable length, has “haha” or a smiley in every reply, laughs at my jokes(even when not funny), and she thinks i’m really smart). the question i have is, is she just being nice or does she geniunely like me? if so, what should my next move be?
    thanks for reading guys, some help would be much much appreciated.

    • shizzlefish123

      I’m well pissed off i asked out this girl. she took years thinking about it and said no. Then she decided to start go oh thx bbe an shiz like tht. Mate don’t worry she might like u but don’t leave i to long before u ask her out because she won’t want to go out with u because u will be great friends and if tht happens u have got a 3 in 10 chance mate. so try not to be gay about it and ask her out. I know it didnt work for me but it might for u.If people laugh at u just say well least ive got the balls to ask someone out. go for it guy.

  • Mark

    I am leaning towards one direction but i want to make sure I’m just not trying to put something there that is not. I met this girl a little over a month ago. The first few days were really great, a lot of contact by phone and in person. Then she cancelled a dinner date, I’m separated in the waiting for the finalization date, and she knows this- I was up front with her when I talked to her and asked her out, she said a big yes by the way. She mentioned she was out of a LTR of three years not too long ago and was not looking for a relationship, (which i told her right now i couldn’t either until the finalized but was interested in building a good friendship that had potential for more in the future) and she didn’t want to complicate my life right now any more than it is. I called her the next day and she sounded relieved that i called and told me several times that she was glad I called. At that point I thought I was in the “friend zone”, the next day she started texting me and she invited me out to lunch, which was great, complete eye contact, always smiling and laughing. We normally text, a lot of :) and ;) and no really short answers though it does take sometimes a long time for her to respond, but she will initiate conversations too, especially if we had not talked for a couple of days. We have hung out a few more times, always good eye contact and laughing. Nothing physical has happened, which is fine for now pending my situation. Long story short this week things have seemed to jump forward but I keep recalling that conversation where she said shw wasn’t looking for a relationship. She kept hinting at that she wanted to hang out, so we had lunch on Friday. Things went really well, she offered me to try some of her food using my fork which I had already been using, I offered to go get another fork, her response was that she didn’t care. I then took it up a notch and we both shared a dessert off the same bowl. She offered three different things we could do togerher to hang out, and one of the things I sugested i got a “Hell Yeah” before I could even finish. The next day was pretty much quiet, then Sun. I cooked her some food and brought it to her. We talked for an hour in the hallway, great eye contact, smiles, laughing at dumb jokes, and messing with her hair and kept touching her mouth and had some nervous energy. The next day she textd me and we talked on and off all day, telling me over and over how good my food was. We missed a connection for lunch that day but she mentioned next time I go to that restaurant she wants to go. The next day, she called me out of the blue and left me a message, basically to say goodmorning, told me a little about what she was doing, wished me a good day, and that she was calling to say hi. I did not call her back right away, i was sleeping from working overnight, she did not answer when i called back. I later called her and caught her on the way out to work, she told me she was napping when I called her back, we talked for a little bit, ok conversation but she gets bad service, so garbled too. So I’m beginning to think that there is the potential for more there and she is interested, but as I mentioned that whole “not looking” conversation. She hsa been completely honest with me, no questions about that. Am I out of the “friend jail” or she is just being friendly?

    • Daiana

      Hi! I need some help! I’m in a relationship that doesn’t make me happy! It’s the second time when I’m in a rel with this guy. He’s my ex, last summer we were together and my prnts didn’t agree and we broke up. Now they don’t know about him and we have a rel at distance. The point is that I realized that he doesn’t deserve me. I just read the 45 things that a girl wants and I figured out that he doesn’t act like that. I need someone to treat me right. To admit it, he’s under my standards, I know I deserve better that this. He NEVER has time for me, and I’m serious about that, like never never and I just want someone to make me happy. I ask too much? I just don’t understand why guys don’t see the real me. I’m nice, polite, beautiful, smart,friendly and I can cook. :)))) :D I think I would be such a good gf but it seems like my prince doesn’t come :))))

      • Jesus

        Cough* Cough* Self-centered whore.

        • Charli

          I agree with you mate.

          • Jasmine

            Me too.

      • John

        Ok, I am looking for someone EXACTLY like you! Now, the places I meet girls are mainly in class, but a lot of the girls are focused on learning rather than dating. I suggest that you find someone to study with in class, or in a co-ed educational institution where you may find someone that can study with you. Like you said, you can cook; thinking ten steps ahead, you can make dinner when you bring him over to study! Use your attributes to your advantage, as they emphasize what type, and kind, of person you are. And this is a win-win situation, because if school is uninteresting for you, then said “guy” will MAKE things interesting. Also, bringing a guy home from your class to study puts a good rep in for your parents. And I can’t seem to figure this out, but girls never consider a man who their parents will like; YES this is a free country and there is rarely any honour killings in North America, but the guy has to be your parents son-in-law…. don’t you want your boyfriend/husband/companion/common-law to make your parents proud? And you can also rate the guy based on his academic success about how much he cares about things that are important to him. If he achieves high grades in school, then he cares a lot about his future because it is IMPORTANT. SO, if you happen to start a relationship with said “guy,” wherein you confirm that you are both mutually attracted to each other, then he will care about you A LOT in correlation to his good grades, academic achievements and success. Try and go for the guy that keeps to himself, but every now and again tries to start a conversation with people that sit around him in class. This suggests that said “guy” doesn’t have a lust for power or control over things, i.e. will not control you in the relationship. There’s a lot to consider for women, as now they have become equal in most of contemporary societies around the world. Women always want guys that neglect them, that treat them wrong. Why? Because its our innate human nature to always want what we cant have; to want someone who doesn’t want you. As a women, you have to break that law of attraction, which I have seen done, and find a man that will make you happy. Also, a more formal contextualization of finding your “man” can go like this. Theory, theorizing is within a larger spectrum of inquiry. Now, what does this mean? It means you have to think about what you want; when you see a cute guy, don’t approach him right away. To meet “the one,” a woman must stalk a man they are interested in, this means on almost a daily basis, so a classroom, workplace, or frequent community gatherings are best, a woman must stalk their said “prey.” Yes, gather information about the man, what his interests are, his grades in school, former sexual/intimate relationships, personality, and his immediate friends. I must say, to judge a man, look at his immediate friends, that is an awesome way to find out what a guy is really all about. Because a man’s friends portray who he is interested in communicating with within his milieu. I know this is probably a lot for you to think about, but contemporary men are depreciating due to being raised improperly by modern family households. If you ARE SERIOUS ABOUT FINDING YOUR MAN, this is the way you will have the highest probability in finding him. Remember to theorize how he will interact with you, your family, your milieu, and who he really is. A lot of these guys, not to be conceited but I would say I am one of them, suggesting that I am a very caring, smart, extremely honest and intelligible man myself, are not guys you normally find chasing after you, or trying to sit next to you. NO. These types of guys, the presumed “one,” i.e. your soul mate, is around you, but not clearly visible at first glance. In order to find him, you must use unbiased observation to weed the good ones out. Think of these men as guys who are not worried about finding the right girl, because they know their honest and sincerity will do it for them… Remember, learn to use and master observation. Only then, will you find said “guy.”

    • Kris

      Dude, she just wants to get over her guy by getting on you….. let it happen. she just wants a **** buddy right now. better do it before someone else does

  • Bruno

    Guys gimme a help here:

    I received a letter with the number of a girl i found really pretty; we talked alot via SMS and we even ended up spending whole nights speaking on the phone, she was always telling me beautiful words, asking me to call her and so on; n also the 1st time we met she was always looking at my eyes and my lips, always smiling and playing with her hair…

    But SUDDENTLY, she started ignoring me; she keeps saying im a bad boy to her; the last time i met face-to-face with her..3 random guys appeared and she gave them full attention (and when i walked away, she told to me to stop being bad to her?! WTFF???)); etc etc…she no longer initiates conversations nor calls me….All I know is that she told me once that she likes to see boys “suffering” a bit for her…and while this may seem something strange, she’s a really cool girl…but at the same time, a bit immature i guess?

    This doesn’t look like as “suffering”…seems much worse now =.=”

    IDK what to do, nor if she still likes me or not….help plz? =3 Is this some hard-to-get immature game?

    • Dr. Luv

      Could be she was interested in you, showed signs and you didn’t respond so she lost interest. Giving full attention to three other random guys could have been a test to see how you would handle it or she could be an attention seeker of men? In my opinion she was kind of disrespectful to you if the two of you were out and she ignores you while giving three random guys her full attention. You wrote that she told you that she likes to see men suffer for her? Sounds like a game player to me. Do you really want to be a pawn in one of her games? She sounds like the type of woman who will jump ship when someone better comes along or gives her the attention she desires. Games are for children. Let her play games with other suckers while you move on and find a woman who doesn’t play games.

      • Bruno

        ((Replying to both answers))

        To make something clear here…I’m 16 and she’s 14; There are 18-20 years old guys that give her their numbers or ask her her number.
        In front of me, she never accepted any of them; and she also told me she normally never gives out her number… (which, as i mentioned be4, i got it from a letter =3…); But how do I know if she doesn’t act like this to everybody else? =3

        I do hate ppl that like to play with other’s sentiments or playing immature games such as the “hard-to-get” game..but this teen just caught my eye for some reason; so, in order to check if she was a decent girl i tried something out xD… I acted like I a “weak” guy, and watched how she’d react to it, would she make a move and indirectly tell me to not give up?…Well, i kinda got the same sh1t…still ignores…

        BUT, every time I’m with her she acts really nicely to me; she constantly asks me to dance; plays with my hair; crosses eyes and so on..but the fact is that every time I’m with her, our parents are near! And every time I want to start a conversation and ask her out, she ignores me! I won’t kiss her in front of my parents but I really don’t know if I should keep trying…

        Im not an ultra high-confident man, but duh, I look at myself as a pretty guy according to what girls say; i’ve been trying to get a better attitude but it isn’t that easy, since I’m a natural shy guy… (so much off-topic, but i wanted to share some more info)
        If she lost the interest, is there any way I can get it back?

        Important stuff to have in consideration:
        -got a letter xP
        -she showed me loads of interest 2 weeks ago (as I mentioned: looking at my lips, playing with hair; asking to dance; “sleeping –like” near me -> she than changed when I wanted to move on..)
        -24/7 ignore
        -A lot of the stuff she does with me, she also did with the other 3 guys
        -She fcking keeps telling me I’m a bad guy since day 3-4!!! I don’t know why…
        PROS+CONS+parents = Mind-Blown
        I AM STUCK and I want this girl badly!!!
        (ty for the help u guys have been giving me, I’ll try to get u guys up-dated with stuff until I actually make “the last move”..

      • John

        I had the exact same thing happen,but I think it’s just because girls tell each other everything and I think she may of found out what I done with some other girl,so that’s probably the reason but It wasn’t sex just fingered her so it isn’t even bad

    • someone

      Im a girl and I’ll admit, that is really weird. Did you maybe do something that she found out about that made her think that you are a “bad boy”??

    • John

      just remember… women need men more than men need women. Allow me to elucidate. The hormone element called “estrogen” that resides in the female body is driven by emotional and sexual tendencies. Where GUYS HAVE TESTOSTERONE! The greatest hormone known to humankind. It allows you to build muscle, and release sexually stimulating odours to the opposite sex I.e. women. What I am biologically saying is, DO NOT WORRY! THIS HAS HAPPENED TO ME SO MANY TIMES! 9 times out of 10, when i showed i was mature and that I didn’t care when said “girl” was trying to make me jealous, they came crawling back to me. Remember, as a man, as an historical authoritative figure within global empowerment, as the presumed DOMINANT SEX, do not fret my friend. I’m not going to be colloquial and say “there’s more fish in the sea,” what I will say is not to worry. Don’t show weakness. As the italians call them “fredo.” Meaning weak. Don’t show girls getting you down, start lifting weights, or begin a proactive activity wherein you metaphysically develop a better self understanding of yourself, and change your life. Don’t let one little, weak, dumb, bimbo get you down. As shakespeare states “Frailty thy name is woman,” in context to women being susceptible to male affiliated attraction. Just go find something you like doing, and be a pro at it. Chicks will follow….. trust me.

      References- Personal experience chopping bitches
      Empirical biological data.

      • Ghost girl

        Females are not weak!!!!!!

    • Ghost girl

      Play it back if she does this it means no ones every tried it with her

  • Riki

    Ok ive know this girl for a while now we go out and txt alot i mean we dont talk by phone ever!.she says that she dosent like to talk by phone and our conversation are always by txt. Ge go out and everything is fine we talk like normal. Ive never tell her that i like her i dont know if she likes me or not, i mean some times i invite her out some time she ask me out, but the thing that shock me was that she told me one time that she was heart broken cuz a guy that she like was maried and he only wanted to get in her pants. By that time she broke my heart too jaja. I mean should i tell her how i feel. Everything is normal now she never again mention the guy. One more thing do you guys know if she posibly know that im into her i mean i do anything and everything for her. Thnx

    • Dr. Luv

      You asked if we think she possibly knows that you are into her….Don’t know but she knows she can get you to do anything and everything for her. Stop doing anything and everything for her….unless you want to be a prisoner of the friend zone. Stop with the texting and call her. I bet if she had a boyfriend she’d be talking with him on the phone. At this point what do you have to lose but to tell her how you feel but be prepared for the worst. She may indeed already only see you as a friend and if the two of you become more then friends and break up she will no longer have you around to conveniently do anything and everything for her. My last advice…become a challenge to her. Stop texting or seeing her for awhile. See how she reacts. I have a gut feeling she only wants your friendship…but I could be wrong.

      • Riki

        Thnx one more thing today she invited me to dinner to wish me good luck for a job intervew i have tomorrow i mean it was her treat. Does that means something?

        • Dr. Luv

          Does it mean anything? Stop analyzing things and just go with the flow. It could be a friend treating a friend to dinner and dessert or it could mean she invited you to dinner and is going to have crazy sex with you afterwards. Seriously, this analyzing everything is just going to drive you crazy.

          • Riki

            Thanx for your help im gonna take the jump i will let u know

  • Ryan

    I hung out with a girl for a little while who followed some of your rules, but not others, e.g. *never* initiated contact, poured out emotional baggage, cancelled our last date without proposing a make-up one. The weird thing is, for a little while, she went from taking forever to replying to my texts to replying to them almost instantly. She was also *incredibly* touchy. I could never interpret her signals because they were so mixed. Anyway, I have a CD of hers which I said I wanted to return; I said text me when you wanna meet up and never heard from her again. Maybe she liked me and I blew it, or maybe she’s just a serial flirt and got bored. I don’t wanna be a repository for her crap though, so do I just mail her CD back/dump it in her letterbox? Or hold onto it and forget the whole issue?


      Me and my girlfreind just got together and she’s a very shy
      kind of girl but whenever I hang out with her she always brings her friend
      and I talk to her on Facebook and she tells me she wants me to kiss
      Her then why I try she goes and talks to her friend????

    • Dr. Luv

      Hold on to it and forget the whole issue. Perhaps she started replying instantly to your text messages because she was having problems with another man in her life? Mixed signals or just stringing you along. Obviously the CD or meeting up with you again soon isn’t that important to her if she never responded. Move on.

  • Rob Lee

    How do I know she is interested in me,, she act’s really calm around me, when her brother says a bad joke she immidiately looks at me, & she is older than me, & she isn’t shy around me almost anyone… Looking forward 4 ur help

    • joeee

      well i asked this girl for her number , she gave it to me and now she allways takes long to text back .. it makes me think what was the point in giving me her number in the first place

      • xkaryuux

        She could just be busy, or it could mean that she’s not interested. Talk to her in person, but don’t mention anything about the late replies.

      • L

        You know what? That’s what I’m experiencing right now. I ask her number, she gave it to me. After knowing that I have a crush on her, she never get interested in me anymore. I think I should stop thinking about her, cause it’s just a waste of time. Why you waste your time on someone else who’s not interested in you? I think the best thing to do is to forget that person.
        Agree with me Bro?

      • Adam

        mate i am have the same thing wtf ? init

  • puffy

    hay im 18 and iv been talking to this girl for about a month or two now flirting with her non stop. iv told her id do anything i could for her, she asked me if i know some one with horses and i did so i took her down there to ride well that night we went up to the park here in town and a couple of my buddys were there. well one smokes so she didnt get close but than after a few min a seen she was just drifting away.. i came over and asked wat was wrong and she just said to go away… she did this several times.. well she went to walk home and i said id walk her back like i normaly do.. but she told me not to walk with her and to go away… than later that same night she txted me and said i was like sorry but ur like my brother and i just dont know wat to do anymore…

    • stan smith


    • Unknown

      ur in the ” friend zone ” lol

  • john doe

    Ok i went out with this chick tonight. I was really into her i had a good time. i told her found her very attractive. She said your making me blush and she found me attractive too. then she said she was going to karoakee with her friends and i said well im getting a migraine im a head up. and then i told her have a good night im a take some meds and probably go to sleep on text. she ends with talk to you soon and leaves a smiley face. Talk to you soon means shes not interested right? She woul say talk to you tomorrow i would think. So i guess i should just leave her alone and just do my own thing. Or does talk to you soon not mean anything? To me shows dis interest. I would never say talk to you soon to a female if iw as interestd id say all talk to you tomorrow

    • john doe

      she invited me to karaokee to meet her friends but i said im a head out and go home.

    • Hazz

      Your retarded

      • Midget

        How long did it take you to come up with that Hazz? Your a clown.

      • Midget

        How long did it take you to come up with that Hazz? You’re a clown.

    • Kristy

      I don’t think there’s anything wrong with “Talk to you Soon” Sometimes I say that to people and even people I like. Soon could mean tomorrow, it’s hard to tell, but I dont think that thats a bad thing at all. You should probably hang in there and see if she puts up a bigger sign telling you if she likes you or not.

    • Dr. Luv

      Chill brother! You are analyzing things way too much and freaking out over the meaning of her words. First things first.

      How long have you known this…chick? Is this the first time the two of you have gone out? If yes, why are you already telling her how attractive she is? Bad move dude. You place higher value on her then yourself. Sure she replied that she found you attractive too but if she is a nice girl which she appears to be, what was she suppose to say?

      That aside, it seems like she enjoyed her time with you and even invited you to go to Karoakee and meet her friends…but you couldn’t make it because of a migraine. Don’t sweat it man, just go with the flow.

      If she sees you tomorrow or in the near future, just play it cool and don’t fawn all over her, once a girl knows you are really into her, she has you by the balls. Let her come to you and hold back on the compliments, but this doesn’t mean treat her like shit or disrespect her either. Just play it cool.

  • xkaryuux

    There’s a girl I met on my birthday in Jan. We went bowling with a group of friends in March where I drove her home, then she took me out for dinner in April where I did the driving again. So we only met 3 times, but I really liked her and told her my feelings, only to my disappointment. Reasons: she’s older than me, and she wants someone older than her and to be more secure and mature. Can’t really help it.

    We went bowling the day after I got rejected with a bunch of friends, and I drove her home again. The other day we went out for dinner again because she wanted to repay me for some translations that I did for her. Again, I went to pick her up. Our houses are about a 40min drive apart.

    Her English isn’t up to scratch sometimes because she’s a non-native speaker, so what she says can be confusing. I took a few hints from her, or so I thought. She wanted to know what “I like you” translated to; she said I was sweet — so I asked her if I was — and she replies with, “I dunno, I haven’t tasted you before..”

    I really didn’t know which way to take it. We used to text a lot, but now she takes a long time to reply so I take it that she’s trying to put some distance between us.

    Problem with me is that I’m too much of a gentleman (I don’t like bragging, though) to let her go home alone etc, and she never says no, though she does hesitate when I say I’ll come pick you up. Dilemma much? I’m probably wasting my time.

    • Dr. Luv

      It sounds like she only sees you as a friend. If you can deal with being just friends with her remain friends. But if you have feelings for her when she already told you she was looking for an older man, sticking around will just bring you heartache my friend.

      At least she is repaying you back for your favors by taking you out to dinner, that’s cool. But don’t misinterpret her friendliness as anything more than it is or it will only cause problems between the two of you and ruin the friendship.

      She may be putting distance between the two of you because she knows you like her while she doesn’t like you the same way. I’m thinking she doesn’t want to hurt or mislead you. Nothing wrong with having women friends as long as its a two sided friendship and neither have attraction for the other.

      • xkaryuux

        Thankyou for the post.

        After I posted the above comment, I found out from my friends that she was allegedly four-timing me – apparently she has a bad history of doing it in the past and hence the reason for her being single. She doesn’t know what she wants, and juggles guys around to find the best one. So I wasn’t actually “out of the question”.

        Some people would say that is totally appropriate, some would say otherwise. I just broke off the friendship and pretended I had never met her. ‘Twas easier said than done, though.

        • Dr. Luv

          Oh…she’s one of those types of women who likes to keep four or five guys around in her life, stringing each one of them along. No doubt each one of these guys believes they have a shot at having a committed relationship with her, unaware that she has these other guys in her life.

          I would bet that she is one of those women who dominate her relationships with her guy friends. She has probably been put on a pedestal by every guy in her life, so she gets away with acting like a bitch and being rude or disrespectful if she disagrees or has a misunderstanding with one of her guy friends. When this happens the unfortunate sap gets thrown to the back of the line, to sit in turmoil. The same thing will happen if one of these guys starts developing feelings for her.

          Best stay away from this woman, she will use and abuse you. She knows exactly what she wants. Guys in her life who will do things for her and jump through hoops for her.

          • xkaryuux

            Yeah, I felt like she was just using me as her emotional punching bag. She always complains about things, worries too much, saying negative things.. not just to me, but to her girl friends as well, so I’m guessing she does it to the other guys too.

            All I can say is that life is a whole lot smoother without someone “punching” me now :)

          • John

            This is the result to societies misfortunate mistake: Women’s rights. In the eyes of what you have just said Dr. Luv, women’s rights was a huge mistake… before their rights were constituted, society was much more intelligible and rational. Now, everyone fends for themselves… Truly one of society’s BIGGEST mistakes.

  • Jeff

    I’ve known this girl for a few years as a friend. One night it seemed like we were starting to get closer. It felt like we both were feeling it. She called me two days later all excited about the great time she had.

    That night I started to develop feelings for her but held those feelings in for a couple of weeks until we talked one night and I said “I enjoy your company and would like to spend more time with you and see where things go. She didn’t really respond. Not a good sign.

    Finally after two weeks she said she had too much on her plate right now with her job and raising a daughter and didn’t want to deal with a relationship right now but wanted to still hang out and see where things go. Not a good sign again.

    Fast forward 4 months later, where we started to spend a little more time together as friends I asked her if all she ever saw me as was just a friend, I said I needed to know because it would make things a lot more easy and comfortable and she didn’t reply.

    Should I just move on or should I just go with the flow? Last time we talked she started mentioning things I do that bug her. I’m guessing this could be her way of saying I annoy her and we are just too different to attempt any kind of relationship???

    I do have feelings for her and would hate to end a friendship but I know as a friend with feelings I don’t want to see her with another guy, which tells me I really can’t be friends with her. Help!

  • Nour

    A lot of these are false, especially if it’s a shy girl like me. Some girls wait for guys to make the first move. Or she’s pretending not to like a guy because she thinks he’s too good for her (story of my life). xD This might be a guide about an open girl, but not one that’s an introvert.

  • abhijit

    i love a girl since 6 years and she is elder than me by 2 years.but she is my best friend i control my feelings.we were like best buddies.she used to tell me all her problems(only problems) .now she was job less.i gave her a nice job through my reference.she is alone here now.her family is staying outstation.her brother left her at my responsibility.last week i proposed here,but she told me that i am her friend,and also she told that she is thinking of some1 she stopped talking with me and doesn’t want to see my face.but i am living my life by watching her face only.just help me out i want her back in my life as my girlfriend.

    • Smair

      heey man, you can get her back !
      but first youve got to make the friends step !
      youve got to get her back to be ur friend !
      after that work on making her your girlfriend !
      but try not to push her away by doing this dont make her hate u!
      show her that u care about her and u can handle her !
      i just dont know the girl so i just cant tell u what to exactly make with her but take it easy ! and remember always be who u are and have faith in who u are !

  • brandy

    I can only say that spell was the best help that I could have had during the most traumatic time I’ve ever had in my life. My boyfriend of 2 ½ years decided to call off our relationship. Everything that he said would happen did, his behaviour was like reading from your lips. In terms of insight into my own personality and the way that I behave it was invaluable and I really won’t make those mistakes again, ever. So thank you , I would certainly recommend this to anyone going through difficult times, it was fantastic, it gave me a plan, which in turn gave me hope and got my life back on track at the same time. This got me through the first few weeks and is still helping me now.He now does all of the things that he never used to do and I’m so less needy, I feel like all of the negative stuff that made me what I’d become have fallen away and I’m back to my real self again. brandy

  • jeremy

    right so i met this girl bout a month ago when her friend asked me for my number because she liked me.we started texting a lot and i met up with her that weekend i n the nightclub.things really clicked and we ended up kissing a good bit.week after same story lot of texting weekend met up again and kissed again she seems to be really intereseted in the week after i ask her out she says she cant that night ok its i text her a bit more during the week but now shes not replying so i wait a few days and then just ask her if she is still interested i get a reply and she says she is she just been busy.i go out that weekend again and end up meeting her again we hang out for about 2 hours end end up pasionatly kissing again.we talk the next day laugh and joke around on the phone no day i ask her out again no reply.i dont know what to think because she seems really into me but she keeps coming up with excuses during the week and giving me the cold shoulder.really like her and like this to grow but have a feeling shes just playing me

  • me

    this doent apply to me at all………… i guess im just shy. and when a guy buys me something i usually dont want to take cause i feel im not that important for him to waste his money on!!!…………sorry.

    • Faith Hope and Love

      U r sooo worth it!! Yes, u may feel this way, but girly, you should love urself!!! Then you will feel confidence and ur already halfway to getting a bf!!! Trust me, ur worth it!!! :)

  • Andy

    i know this girl at work since 3 months.she is very reserved,serious kind of professional.Good looking and very smart and very indivualistic.She gave a good eye contact first 2 times we bumped into each other and smiled.I smiled back and said hi.we had good first introduction in the first week at a common event,she was asking lot of questions,seemed very interested,laughed a lot and after1hr,said it was nice meeting me and left.Then for next 2 weeks it was just hi,how are you stuff since we work at different place and in between she came for coffee upon my request.we both get a bit nervous unless we have someone else with us.
    I felt very strong feeling that she is intersted only cos of her body language and constant eye contact.I was careful about each other cos it is workplace.she seems to smile and come nearby me,only when i ignore her for few days(i have no idea why she does that).instead when i approach or msg,she doesnt respond or seem interested atleast by face expressions and her tone.
    apart from me there is someone else who noticed taht she is interested in me by the way she leans over and constant eye contact and immediately turning her face when i catch her.
    After 2 months,once she started looking and smiling,i took a chance and said i like her a lot and complimented about her .even though it was just 2-3 months we know each other and might be too soon to express,i was happy i did that to atleats let her know that i dont want to be a normal colleague or her common friend.
    she said that i dont know anything abt her.and said she is not comfortable talking about that now.but later said thanks you think it that way but would like to keep things at work smooth.i said ok i will not disturb you more and day she was beaming with big smile but i didnt return that back.i dont know why she was smiling,which she usually doesnt do.
    after few days i asked her to have a short talk and she said that i dont know why you keep asking that and we are only colleagues.
    Does that really mean she is not intersted in me or she wants me to try hard or give her some space?
    i was thinking not to look or talk with her.
    i just cant believe that her body language and eye contact had different meaning of what she is actually telling.

    • Jay

      You see, THAT right there is a situation that becomes known as the “paradox” which means that the tell-tale signs of female attractions fall far from the truth. In other words, there are girls out there who are simply attention-seekers and manipulate those signs of attraction (i.e. eye contact and smile) to gain interest from as many men as possible. Believe me, I have just seen too many…
      If what I have said so far seems to be utter nonsense, then try to see it from her perspective and you will understand. If you were interested in a guy and he asked you out, would you even hesitate to give a response? Think about it. From experience, I believe that any form of hesitant response from a girl can be taken as a sign that the girl is not as interested in you as first thought. Hope this helps.

      • Andy

        Thanks Jay for the reply.Yes, i understand what you said and completely agree that she is just gaining interest from as many men as possible.
        So now i was ignoring completely from last week with not even an eye contact(may be likewise from her as well) and she happend to see me with another girl at lunch.And i saw signs of jealousy and also she appeared around my seating zone,which didnt happen before…what would you do in a situation like this….how would you go about to mould this situation into your favor….keep ignoring or play smart?

    • Smair

      have you tried to ask her why is she doing this?
      tell her what you feel !
      tell her that you feel that thing inside you when she stare at you ! when she smile, ask her is it a friendly thing or does she like you ?
      try to ask her out if u really love her show her that u care if she rejected !
      just keep talking to her and show her that you really like her !
      she might like you and feel comfortable talking to u and tell u what she really feel !
      Am sorry i can’t her you any further because i don’t know her personality

      • Andy

        Thank you Zaid.That was very nice fo you.
        I will say those things,next time i get a chance.Even though the delay which happended now might be a bad thing still will try to see what she replies.She is kind of a moderm peorfessional women,who is tough and serious from the outside.

  • brianna

    i am a girl and all of this is completely bogus especially #1

  • Bud

    So this female friend of mine invited me out with her, her girl friend, a guy friend and his guy friend. She was trying to set up her girl friend and guy friend. We went to the bar and had a good time, went to another bar when she started getting stumbling drunk. She asked if I wanted to play darts so I did. We never even finished the game as she staggered over to a table to talk to other people. I got kind of pissed. Like she was dissing me…and that she was so drunk.

    We all went back to her place, I said something smart ass about her and her hill billy neighbors whom she hates and she erupted, screaming “get the hell out of my house”…I didn’t because I was too drunk to drive the 16 miles home.

    After everyone left I asked her why she seems to have so much hatred or anger for me? We have been friends for 4 years. She really didn’t say much. So I took her in my arms and told her I didn’t want to fight with her, that she was one of my best friends and than inexplicably I leaned in and kissed her on the lips and told her I just want her to be happy whether I was in her life or not. Everything seemed cool after that.

    The next morning we hung out, ate, watched movies with her daughter and then her guy friend called and she invited him over. After the phone call she said, “I’m sorry I should have asked you if that was okay” Not sure how to take that as it was her home and I’m just a friend.

    Thing is the other guy came over at around 4:00 pm and stayed until 11:00pm. And the two of them seemed to get along better than her and I.
    I almost felt like she wanted him to stay that long due to the kiss I gave her the night before???

    Not sure if her and the other guy have ever been together intimately. She says he is just a good friend and she was setting him up with her best female friend. Do women set up guy friends they may have slept with, with their best female friends. I’m soooooo confused.

    • John

      Screw these kinds of women. Find girls yourself. Take initiative. Its more productive to play video games at home rather than meet girls this way. Find your own way to facilitate chicks within your milieu.